This week I was meant to write about moving. That post is waiting for next week, because right now, I need to talk about something more pressing: maintenance woes.
Most of us feel the end-of-month crunch. Even though as an entrepreneur my income comes in at different times, debits, bills, and necessities all pile up at once. Rent, electricity, groceries — they don’t wait.
A week before month end, a client payment was delayed, and suddenly my whole budget was knocked off course. This is sometimes part of the rollercoaster of being an entrepreneur. It’s not as simple as a guaranteed paycheck on the 25th. The hustle can get real. (Especially when your rainy-day fund has been drained by both unforeseen circumstances and predictable responsibilities that should have been shared.)
To fill the gap, I took on extra work, late nights, and long hours. My body waved the red flag — crashing at 7pm, setting an alarm for 10pm to fit in some work until midnight while my girls slumbered, then up again at 4am to start the cycle again. Absolutely exhausted, stretched thin, and still juggling the demands of single motherhood.
And then, as life often does, it added more.
The girls needed to be with me for the weekend because their dad was working. I love having them with me, but time was crunched even further. My planned “rest and catch-up weekend” turned into a stretch of shuffling, rearranging, and doing my best to keep everyone cared for.
Friday night we went to Spur with friends — my youngest’s playdate, my oldest at youth group, me running on fumes. It was supposed to be a simple night out, but it ended at Red Cross Emergency after my little one fell and hurt her hand. (Here again I wished I still had my rainy-day fund, because without medical aid, private care wasn’t an option.)
Hours in the waiting room, surrounded by other children’s trauma — burns, stitches, broken bones, scans. I tried to shield her as much as I could, but it was intense. We finally got home just before midnight, with a swollen hand, a greenstick fracture to monitor, and instructions to keep it elevated. Another night of no sleep.
By Saturday, I could barely stand, but I didn’t want to cancel plans. We managed the 50th birthday brunch I was honoured to be invited to (and I’m glad we did — it was absolutely lovely), but again I crashed with the sunset.
Sunday brought church, Connect group family lunch, and my eldest’s school exhibition where I was so proud of her photography skills being featured.
Precious memories were made, laughter was shared, unicorn face-paint with a matching balloon was adorable. Wholesome moments I’ll treasure forever.
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Acceptance and Gratitude
All of this left me feeling despondent, just going through the motions. On the surface, things looked fine, but deep down, I needed to sit with it.
And the truth is, I had to accept: some people don’t see responsibility and accountability the way I do. Delays happen. Things break. Life throws curveballs. Fighting it is not an option.
All we can do is focus on what we can control, push forward, and shift our focus to gratitude.
Gratitude for watching my youngest play Lego and build a super creative house all on her own. Gratitude for cooking with my eldest, giggling and surprising each other with frights throughout the day. Gratitude for belly laughs, for small wins, for these random moments that are my why.
The Hidden Costs of “Maintenance Woes”
On top of finances, parenting, and emergencies, there’s the everyday upkeep of life. For me this week, it looked like:
- A washing machine with a heating element that’s gone, which means no dryer function.
- A mini fridge whose “freezer” can’t actually freeze.
- A dentist check-up I asked for help with two months ago but eventually had to sort out myself.
- Full extra mural cost for my kids that I had to cover alone.
- Feeling my body cry out for self-maintenance — what I really need is a full-body massage (ideally a tiny Thai lady stomping on my back).
- Friendships and relationships that I simply don’t have capacity to maintain right now, even though I miss my tribe deeply.
Maintenance isn’t just about bills. It’s about bodies, homes, kids, emotions, and relationships. It’s the invisible, constant upkeep of life that never truly goes away.
Flipping the Script
But here’s where the script flipped for me a few days ago.
At the end of the day, I slowed down enough to do something I love — cooking. Not a quick meal, not half-scratched together between emails and deadlines, but a full, wholesome meal from scratch. Just using what we had, turning simple ingredients into something delicious, filled with love, appreciation, and gratitude.
It reminded me: life doesn’t have to be extravagant to be meaningful. Sometimes, it’s the simplest acts — stirring a pot, sharing laughter, building memories — that fill the soul most deeply.
After dinner, the girls and I had a pillow fight. We laughed until our bellies hurt. It was the perfect day.
And in that moment, exhaustion turned into contentment. I was happy. I was full.
Now, moving forward, I feel grateful and expectant. God has already sent me new clients. I know abundance is flowing. I experience support in those around me. I can feel the fruits of the seeds I’ve sown ripening. I’m looking forward to reaping the harvest of all He has in store for me and my girls.
And as for these maintenance woes? They’ll simplify. They’ll settle into flow. Because I believe life doesn’t always have to be heavy — sometimes, we’re called to let it become simple.
My first step was taking one big, inconsistent interaction off my plate. I went back to maintenance court this morning to file for arrears and to have the orders enforced. The management of this is not my job to carry.
#boundaries
THE MANAGEMENT OF THIS IS NOT MY JOB TO CARRY
I believe life doesnt always have to be heavy
🌱 Tools for Navigating Maintenance Woes
Here’s what I’ve learned — and what helps: 
- Build a “Micro-Nest Egg” (even if it’s tiny).
Put aside whatever you can — R50, R100 — into a separate account or envelope (rainy day fund). Over time, it builds into a cushion for when maintenance doesn’t come through or unexpected costs hit. - Create a “Maintenance Gap” Category.
In your budget, name the things that should be shared but aren’t. Even if you can’t fund it right now, it gives you clarity. When extra income or maintenance finally comes in, top this category first so you’re ahead, not scrambling. - Prioritize Like a Survivor.
Have a simple order written down: rent → electricity → food → school. When funds are limited, you act without the panic of decision fatigue. - Simplify Your Load.
Cancel what no longer serves you. The fewer fixed costs you carry, the less stressful it is when money doesn’t arrive. - Add an Extra Stream (even a trickle).
If possible, dedicate one small stream — like selling unused items, a side project, or freelance task — purely toward an emergency jar. It doesn’t have to be big to make a difference.
💔 The Truth No One Likes to Say
Here’s the reality: it’s not fair. Parents should share responsibility. Court orders should be honored. And I shouldn’t have to put these backup systems in place. (Neither should you)
But — draining my energy on what “should be” won’t serve my girls or myself. There are already so many other things that need my energy.
So instead, I focus on being proactive, putting solutions in place, and letting the law do its part while I hand the rest to God. Because my job isn’t to carry another person’s accountability — my job is to provide a safe, joyful, and abundant life for my daughters.
Side note:
I just wanted to share, that yes, I am fully leaning into the word “woes.” My oldest and I recently binged the Wednesday series, and every episode of Season 2 had “woe” in the title. My favorites? “If These Woes Could Speak” and the very relevant “Woe Me the Money.” Perfect timing, right?
At the end of the day, I’ve realised that maintenance woes are part of life, but they don’t have to steal my joy or dictate my peace. With every challenge, there’s a chance to simplify, shift back to gratitude, and remember that abundance flows when I trust God’s timing.
My girls are my anchor, my laughter, and my why — and with them by my side, even the heaviest weeks can be flipped into something meaningful.
🔮 Teaser for Next Blog Post
And speaking of flipping into something new… the next chapter of our journey is already unfolding. We’re preparing to move again, though we still don’t know exactly where we’ll be for the month of October. What we do know is that God always provides, and that this move is another step closer to the foundation we’re building as a family.
Stay tuned — I’ll be sharing all about the move, the uncertainties, and the faith that carries us forward in next week’s blog.
#KreativeKim #DearDiary #MaintenanceWoes #SingleMomJourney #SimplifyLife #FaithAndAbundance #MothersStrength #BoundariesMatter
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